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The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem: The Definitive Work on Self-Esteem by the Leading Pioneer in the Field Paperback – May 1, 1995

4.6 4.6 out of 5 stars 3,278 ratings

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The modern classic on building self-esteem to improve your mindset, achieve more, and boost your relationships with your partner, kids, co-workers, and more—from a pioneering psychotherapist

“Brilliant, laser-focused, and critically relevant, Dr. Nathaniel Branden’s ‘pillars’ give us a lifelong set of foundations upon which to build our families, our schools and our businesses.”—Dennis Waitley, Ph.D., author of The Psychology of Winning.
 
Six Pillars of Self-Esteem is the culmination of a lifetime of clinical practice and study, hailed as the most significant work on the topic. Immense in scope and vision and filled with insight into human motivation and behavior, it is essential reading for anyone with a personal or professional interest in self-esteem. 
 
Dr. Nathaniel Branden introduces the six pillars—six action-based practices for daily living that provide the foundation for self-esteem—and explores the central importance of self-esteem in five areas: the workplace, parenting, education, psychotherapy, and the culture at large.
Six Pillars of Self-Esteem provides concrete guidelines for teachers, parents, managers, and therapists who are responsible for developing the self-esteem of others. And it shows why—in today’s chaotic and competitive world—self-esteem is fundamental to our personal and professional power.
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Popular Highlights in this book

From the Publisher

Concrete guidelines for teachers, parents, managers, and therapists.

Quote from book, if my aim is to prove I am ‘enough’—I conceded the issue was debatable

Quote from book, self-esteem is the reputation we acquire with ourselves

Quote from book, what is required is the courage to tolerate happiness without self-sabotage

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Self-esteem expert Branden outlines the six characteristics that define his guide to better living, emphasizing personal responsibility and self-reliance.
Copyright 1995 Reed Business Information, Inc.

Review

“Brilliant, laser-focused and critically relevant, Dr. Branden’s ‘pillars’ give us a lifelong set of foundations upon which to build our families, our schools and our businesses.”—Dennis Waitley, Ph.D., author of The Psychology Of Winning.

Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Bantam; Reprint edition (May 1, 1995)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 368 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0553374397
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0553374391
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 2.31 pounds
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.2 x 0.94 x 8.2 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.6 4.6 out of 5 stars 3,278 ratings

About the author

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Nathaniel Branden
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Nathaniel Branden, Ph.D. is a lecturer, a practicing psychotherapist, and the author of twenty books on the psychology of self-esteem, romantic love, and the life and thought of Objectivist philosopher Ayn Rand. His work has been translated into eighteen languages and has sold more than 4 million copies, and includes such titles as Taking Responsibility, The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem, and My Years with Ayn Rand. Branden's name has become synonymous with the psychology of self-esteem, a field he pioneered more than thirty years ago.

Customer reviews

4.6 out of 5 stars
3,278 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers find the book provides enlightening advice and concepts about self-esteem. They describe it as a solid self-help book with relevant ideas and real-life examples. The book offers helpful exercises to put its concepts into practice. However, some readers feel the second half is repetitive and boring. Opinions differ on the writing style - some find it clear and easy to understand, while others consider it not the easiest read.

AI-generated from the text of customer reviews

166 customers mention "Advice"166 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the book's advice. They find it enlightening, with great concepts and explanations of self-esteem and personal integrity. The sentence completion exercises are helpful and should not be skipped. The book helps raise awareness of how you think of yourself and provides insight and clarity that will help you live a happier life.

"...Big brain. Very big brain. He’s the leading authority on the science of self-esteem and, in addition to the big brain/wisdom, he has a..." Read more

"...Overall it has great, solid information to get to the root of low self esteem or to understand the foundations of good self esteem, whether for..." Read more

"Great book for an introduction to your self esteem and the people around you." Read more

"...Nathaniel did a great job explaining abstract concept into words. The exercises are meaningful and rly help me understand myself and others better...." Read more

132 customers mention "Readability"132 positive0 negative

Customers find the book easy to read and understand. They say it's a good read for counselors or someone interested in self-esteem science. The advice is concise and practical, making it worth the price.

"An excellent book with useful writing exercises. I like being able to refer to the printed text anytime...." Read more

"...It is not really a casual listen, but it is fantastic. It would be a great read if you are a therapist counseling others with self esteem..." Read more

"Under 50 pages in and got my moneys worth" Read more

"This book remains the best book I've read since I've bought it...." Read more

37 customers mention "Enlightenedness"29 positive8 negative

Customers find the book provides useful concepts and ideas that can be applied to their lives. They appreciate the relatable scenarios and find it relevant to everyone's life. The book helps them learn how to see life better and learn better.

"...self-esteem and, in addition to the big brain/wisdom, he has a fascinating life story...." Read more

"...It's relevant to everyone's live no matter who you are, what you do, your gender, race etc. We don't teach kids wisdom...." Read more

"...It reaches into every area of life hence why I consider this book indispensable...." Read more

"...This covers the 6 Pillars of self Esteem; Living Conciously, Self Acceptance, Self Responsibility, Self Assertiveness, Living Purposefully, and..." Read more

16 customers mention "Exercise content"16 positive0 negative

Customers find the book's exercises helpful. They say it offers plenty of exercises to put its wonderful definitions into practice. The writing is clear, and the exercises are easy to pick and apply daily to improve self-esteem. There are 6 weekly practices you do, and a 38 week exercise built in.

"...The exercises are meaningful and rly help me understand myself and others better...." Read more

"...additionally, it contains plenty of exercises to do in order to enhance each of the mentioned six pillars...." Read more

"...those looking to acknowledge low self-esteem and then apply exercises it daily to improve it...." Read more

"...There is a 38 week exercise built in, that you can revisit again and again to refine your identity. 1...." Read more

69 customers mention "Writing style"38 positive31 negative

Customers have different views on the writing style. Some find it logical and easy to read, with clear premises and paths. Others mention that the words used are sometimes difficult and the vocabulary is not common.

"...Branden’s style is rigorously smart yet still approachable (and almost Emersonially quotable :)...." Read more

"...I'll go with 3 stays, because the material is amazing but very difficult to get through...." Read more

"An excellent book with useful writing exercises. I like being able to refer to the printed text anytime...." Read more

"...Cons: * Too long and tedious. Part 1 drags some, Part 3 becomes pretty boring by the end. * Sentence completion gets old fast...." Read more

16 customers mention "Boredom"3 positive13 negative

Customers find the book boring and repetitive. They feel it's uninviting, wordy, and unclear. Some readers mention that the second half loses the plot and lacks practicality.

"...Too long and tedious. Part 1 drags some, Part 3 becomes pretty boring by the end. * Sentence completion gets old fast...." Read more

"...I really liked the first half of the book, but I feel the second half was really repetitive and I enjoyed it less...." Read more

"...very small and text so tightly spaced that reading it is arduous and uninviting...." Read more

"...useful and thought provoking and then chapter 13 and on it starts losing the plot. So that is where I stopped reading and was disappointed...." Read more

The book itself is fine, but why to ship like this?
3 out of 5 stars
The book itself is fine, but why to ship like this?
The book is in ok condition, i just do not understand why to ship the book like this without any protective cover on the book itself, I’m planning to sell this books one day and this is just feels like contempt from the seller.
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Top reviews from the United States

  • Reviewed in the United States on March 31, 2016
    The media could not be loaded.
    “Apart from disturbance whose roots are biological, I cannot think of a single psychological problem—from anxiety and depression, to underachievement at school or at work, to fear of intimacy, happiness, or success, to alcohol or drug abuse, to spouse battering or child molestation, to co-dependency and sexual disorders, to passivity and chronic aimlessness, to suicide and crimes of violence—that is not traceable, at least in part, to the problem of deficient self-esteem. Of all the judgments we pass in life, none is as important as the one we pass on ourselves.”

    ~ Nathaniel Branden from The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem

    Nathaniel Branden is a smart dood. Big brain. Very big brain.

    He’s the leading authority on the science of self-esteem and, in addition to the big brain/wisdom, he has a fascinating life story.

    Nathaniel met Ayn Rand as a teenager and began an intimate relationship with Ayn and her work that lasted over 20 years and included highlights such as Ayn deeming Nathaniel the embodiment of her ideals and Nathaniel helping to create the Objectivist movement. Check out part one of his fascinating interview with Ken Wilber at his website (NathanielBranden.com) for more mojo on that front and to get a personal look at his life and wisdom.

    The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem is, as its sub-title proclaims: “the definitive work on self-esteem by the leading pioneer in the field.” Branden’s style is rigorously smart yet still approachable (and almost Emersonially quotable :).

    In this Note (as with all the others), I’m less interested in giving you an intellectual overview of the subject and more interested in pulling out some of the many Big Ideas we can *immediately* apply to our lives.

    Let’s explore some of the Big Ideas:

    1. The Six Pillars - Of self-esteem.
    2. Practice - Create self-esteem.
    3. Living Consciously - Pillar #1.
    4. Self-Acceptance - Pillar #2.
    5. Self-Responsibility - Pillar #3.

    Yep. It’s clear. Let’s honor the small improvements we’re making as we develop our self-esteem and live more and more radiantly conscious lives,

    More goodness— including PhilosophersNotes on 300+ books in our ​*OPTIMIZE*​ membership brianjohnson . me.
    40 people found this helpful
    Report
  • Reviewed in the United States on September 24, 2024
    An excellent book with useful writing exercises. I like being able to refer to the printed text anytime. So for me it was worth purchasing this hard copy.
    12 people found this helpful
    Report
  • Reviewed in the United States on February 12, 2021
    The content here is very good. I am almost finished with it, and it is BY FAR the best self help type book I’ve read/listened to. I usually prefer books that are psychology based written by psychologists. This is one of those books. If you are into self-help books that feel like your witty, bubbly BFF is giving you a pep talk—know that this is definitely not that kind of book. That is not to say that it is boring, it’s just not cute or charming in any way. It’s direct, clear, well structured, and simple.

    He breaks down what contributes to self esteem and makes important distinctions about what self esteem is not. His guidance for building the six pillars is mostly through practicing stream of consciousness writing assignments—which seems too simple, but it is a useful tool. I initially was re-listening to parts so I could take notes and journal along with it. It is not really a casual listen, but it is fantastic. It would be a great read if you are a therapist counseling others with self esteem issues.

    The only thing I found odd and off putting was his repeated mentions of his personal (mentor/romantic) relationship with author Ayn Rand. Felt like a shameless name drop and took away from the flow of the book. He could’ve made his points without mentioning her name. It wasn’t often, but it was odd.

    Overall it has great, solid information to get to the root of low self esteem or to understand the foundations of good self esteem, whether for yourself or in parenting, teaching, or helping others.
    41 people found this helpful
    Report
  • Reviewed in the United States on September 30, 2024
    Great book for an introduction to your self esteem and the people around you.
    2 people found this helpful
    Report
  • Reviewed in the United States on September 25, 2024
    Under 50 pages in and got my moneys worth
    2 people found this helpful
    Report
  • Reviewed in the United States on June 25, 2021
    If there is one book I would recommend someone to read, this is on the top selections. Nathaniel did a great job explaining abstract concept into words. The exercises are meaningful and rly help me understand myself and others better. Ppl go to school to be "educated" and paying exorbitant money and for what? large number of ppl don't even remember or use the subjects they had "passed" after they graduated hs/college/uni. The lesson offers in this book far more important than what our current school system can offer. It's relevant to everyone's live no matter who you are, what you do, your gender, race etc. We don't teach kids wisdom. We teach them to think like we do and unintededly (or perhaps purposely too in some cases) paved a road for them to make the same mistakes the more "adults" in society have already and constantly do. Then we wonder to ourselves, why is the world the way it is? Do yourself a favor and get this book.
    14 people found this helpful
    Report
  • Reviewed in the United States on September 10, 2021
    This book remains the best book I've read since I've bought it. It's a complete handbook and guide on developing one of your greatest need: Self-Esteem.

    With tremendous detail that's beautifully written, and enlightening all the way through, we get practical steps to develop feeling worthy and competent in life.

    It reaches into every area of life hence why I consider this book indispensable.

    I'm still in awe that addressing self-esteem to the degree Nathaniel Brendan has is unparalleled by even that most prestigious studies, books, or professors/therapists at the best universities (at least in the way this book gives access to the average man).

    As been said, Nathaniel was ahead of his time. Massive gratitude and props.
    3 people found this helpful
    Report

Top reviews from other countries

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  • Kindle Customer
    5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent.
    Reviewed in Canada on April 1, 2024
    I received this book today and I'm presently on page 11. I love it!!! I read some 1 star reviews as well as reddit posts about the book prior to purchasing it. I don't have a background in psychology, however I completed a 4 year business degree. Contrary to some negative reviews, I very much appreciate the language style that the book is written in. The sentences are long, with the use of lots of comas so you have to be able to follow the idea. However this book also contains practical advice to common issues (outside of self esteem). Thus this book is not a gimicky, over simplified one but it's not an academic paper either. It lands in between.

    If you need a therapist because your life has been uprooted in some or all aspects (health, end of marriage/friendships, grief from loss of loved one, issues in career) this book will give you the answers and clarity that you seek prior to seeing a professional. It will give you an idea of where to focus on and understanding of your therapy and I believe it will make you more prepared for your sessions. So glad I found this book.

    5 stars. One of the best books that I now own.
  • Davi Gontijo
    5.0 out of 5 stars Best Self-Help Book Ever
    Reviewed in Brazil on January 26, 2022
    I'm brazillian, but I need to write this in english to reach as many people as I can. The fact is that this book is a gem. The principles that are taught here can be useful regardless of your age, income, situation or your past events and that's why I consider this work a 10 out of 10 for its genre. Many people disdain self-help books saying that all of them are bad, but that's a dangerous thought that comes from an overgeneralization. Can the majority of them be bad? Yes. However, the majority dosen't mean that all of them are. And this misleading reasoning might be able to hinder some individuals to buy a transforming, complete and resourceful book like this one. The reason I claim that comes from the clear positive features that are observed, once the form and content of the book are really good. Firstly, the author is precise in his definitions and summarizes highly important ideas in small phrases in just one line or paragraph, what demonstrates an evident writing skill. Moreover, the content is also imbued of richness, providing that this subject was deeply studied by the author for most of his life and the the practices outlined work well. On the other hand, at the same time that what is shown can work in an exquisite manner, it also demands a certain level of discipline. The results will only appear if you are commited to do all the exercises proposed, without exceptions.
  • Amr F.
    5.0 out of 5 stars one of the best books in psychology
    Reviewed in Saudi Arabia on November 17, 2024
    Dr. Branden may your soul rest in eternal peace
  • Layla
    5.0 out of 5 stars Lectura muy recomendada
    Reviewed in Spain on August 31, 2024
    Si te interesa el estudio del desarrollo de la autoestima, esta lectura es imprescindible.
    Report
  • Amazon Customer
    5.0 out of 5 stars Great vision
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on October 3, 2023
    Exceptional content throughout. Written by an individual who truly understood his field. Highly recommended for those seeking self understanding. Must buy.