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The Way of the Superior Man: A Spiritual Guide to Mastering the Challenges of Women, Work, and Sexual Desire Paperback – January 1, 2004

4.7 out of 5 stars 14,670 ratings

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"I keep giving this book away; I think I've owned 30 different copies already. I tend to pass it out to anybody, man or woman, who has made a commitment to—or even has a passing interest in—the art of loving. David Deida gets it, like no one I've ever read, and he writes about it forcefully, honestly, and downright poetically."
—Michael Tucker, actor and author

"The Way of the Superior Man is quite wonderful. Finally, a guide for the noncastrated male. This book will offend and infuriate some, inspire and test others, but challenge virtually everybody. I found it wise, insightful, occasionally brilliant, and always resourceful. To transcend the body-mind means to transcend and include its sexuality, not transcend and evaporate it. Few are the books that discuss strong sexuality within strong spirituality, instead of tepid sexuality diluted by a mediocre spiritual stance. This book steps straightforwardly into the challenge. Love it or loathe it, it is a shout from the heart of one perspective of the eternal masculine."
—Ken Wilber, author of
Sex, Ecology, Spirituality; No Boundary; and Grace and Grit

"At last! A book that explains the heart and soul of a woman to men. As a woman, I've never felt so understood and validated. This book is a key to helping men and women take their relationships one step further. Finally, a clear and brilliant guide to unraveling the mystery of relationships."
—Marci Shimoff, co-author of the
New York Times #1 bestseller Chicken Soup for the Woman's Soul

"The Way of the Superior Man lays out a challenge before all men to fulfill their true purpose and to be authentically masculine. It will guide you on your journey to a successful and spiritually complete way of life. I invite you to live in the moment, to love openly, and to step up to the plate with this book in your hand."
—Tony Robbins, author of
Awaken the Giant Within and Unlimited Power

"David's work speaks to the core of our work as men. He offers a bold view of men, and challenges us to stand up and lay claim to the beauty and power of the masculine. He does not advocate superiority as in 'superiority to women.' He speaks of superiority as the Greeks might. The challenge is strictly internal. The invitation is to rise above our mediocrity, to let go of making excuses for our own laziness, to stop apologizing for who we are, and to stop blaming others or our childhood for how we've become. He asks that we step into the fullness of our being—intense, focused, powerful, clear. And directly connected to our hearts."
—Dennis Mead-Shikaly, Executive Director: The ManKind Project / New Warrior Network



The Ultimate Spiritual Guide for Men

What is your true purpose in life? What do women really want? What makes a good lover? If you're a man reading this, you've undoubtedly asked yourself these questions—but you may not have had much luck answering them. Until now.

In The Way of the Superior Man, David Deida explores the most important issues in men's lives—from career and family to women and intimacy to love and spirituality and relationships—to offer a practical guidebook for living a masculine life of integrity, authenticity, and freedom. Join this bestselling author and internationally renowned expert on sexual spirituality for straightforward advice, empowering skills, body practices, and more to help you realize a life of fulfillment, immediately and without compromise.

"It is time to evolve beyond the macho jerk ideal, all spine and no heart," writes David Deida. "It is also time to evolve beyond the sensitive and caring wimp ideal, all heart and no spine." The Way of the Superior Man presents the ultimate challenge—and reward—for today's man: to discoverthe 'unity of heart and spine' through the full expression of consciousness and love in the infinite openness of the present moment.

Contents

Part One:  A Man's Way
Part Two:  Dealing With Women
Part Three:  Working With Polarity and Energy
Part Four:  What Women Really Want
Part Five:  Your Dark Side
Part Six:  Feminine Attractiveness
Part Seven:  Body Practices
Part Eight:  Men's and Women's Yoga of Intimacy


Excerpt:

This book is a guide for a specific kind of newly evolving man.  This man is unabashedly masculine-- he is purposeful, confident, and directed, living his chosen way of life with deep integrity and humor-- and he is sensitive, spontaneous, and spiritually alive, with a heart-commitment to discovering and living his deepest truth.

This newly evolving man is not a scared bully, posturing like some King Kong in charge of the universe.  Nor is he a new age wimp, are spineless, smiley, and starry-eyed.  He has embraced both his inner masculine and feminine, and he no longer holds onto either of them.  He doesn't need to be right all the time, nor does he need to always be safe, cooperative, and sharing, like an androgynous Mr. Nice Guy.  He simply lives from his deepest core, fearlessly living his gifts, feeling through the fleeting moment into the openness of existence, totally committed to magnifying love.

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Editorial Reviews

Review

"Any woman who gives this book to the man in her life will soon thank herself for it." -- Yogi Times magazine, March 2006

An astonishingly practical guidebook to living a masculine life of integrity, authenticity, and freedom. --
The Midwest Book Review - Reviewer's Choice

Just reading The Way of the Superior Man may make you a better man, perhaps even a superior one. --
Watkins Review

[David Deida's] insights about male/female interaction can't help but stimulate a more active understanding of this complicated dynamic. --
NAPRA ReView

About the Author

David Deida

Acknowledged as one of the most insightful and provocative teachers of our time, bestselling author David Deida continues to revolutionize the way that men and women grow spiritually and sexually. His 10 books are published in more than 25 languages worldwide and are required reading in university, church, and spiritual center courses. His workshops on a radically practical spirituality have been hailed as among the most original and authentic contributions to the field of self-development currently available. Deida is included in the Watkins Review Spiritual 100 List, designating the most spiritually influential people worldwide. He is a founding member of Integral Institute, and has taught and conducted research at the University of California-San Diego School of Medicine, University of California-Santa Cruz, San Jose State University, Lexington Institute in Boston, and Ecole Polytechnique in Paris, France. Some of his recent books include Blue TruthThe Enlightened Sex Manual, and the 20th Anniversary Edition of the international bestseller, The Way of the Superior Man.

Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Sounds True
  • Publication date ‏ : ‎ January 1, 2004
  • Edition ‏ : ‎ First Edition
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 202 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1591792576
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1591792574
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 9.5 ounces
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 6 x 0.5 x 9 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.7 out of 5 stars 14,670 ratings

About the author

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David Deida
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Acknowledged as one of the most insightful and provocative teachers of our time, bestselling author David Deida continues to revolutionize the way that men and women grow spiritually and sexually. His ten books are published in more than twenty-five languages worldwide and are required reading in university, church, and spiritual center courses. His workshops on a radically practical spirituality have been hailed as among the most original and authentic contributions to the field of self-development currently available. Deida is included in the Watkins Review Spiritual 100 List, designating the most spiritually influential people worldwide. He is a founding member of Integral Institute, and has taught and conducted research at the University of California-San Diego School of Medicine, University of California-Santa Cruz, San Jose State University, Lexington Institute in Boston, and Ecole Polytechnique in Paris, France. Some of his recent books include Blue Truth, The Enlightened Sex Manual, and the 20th Anniversary Edition of the international bestseller, The Way of the Superior Man.

Customer reviews

4.7 out of 5 stars
14,670 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers consider this book a must-read for every man, praising its readability and profound impact on their lives. Moreover, the book provides valuable insights into masculine and feminine traits, and customers find it honest and worth the investment. However, the writing quality receives mixed reviews, with some finding it clearly articulated while others find it simplistic. Additionally, the pacing receives criticism for being nonsensical and weird.

AI-generated from the text of customer reviews

516 customers mention "Readability"484 positive32 negative

Customers find the book highly readable, praising its engaging prose and noting it's a must-read for every man. One customer mentions it is straight to the point, while another appreciates that it can be read without shame.

"...before but Neva tried the outcome this book is suggesting...best book i ever read changed my life and put me ona path to my inner core wit the..." Read more

"...Why did I choose this rating? - Because it is a great read and the information presented is always concise with the intro of each chapter...." Read more

"One of my top three books! Truly invested. Heard about it in a Nipsey Hustle interview, recommended by Lauren London...." Read more

"...of having taken ecstasy simply by engaging your partner is well worth the discipline, or maintain full body orgasms for 30 minutes, 4 times a day is..." Read more

414 customers mention "Insight"380 positive34 negative

Customers find the book provides invaluable insight, breaking everything down to a spiritual level and having a profound impact on their lives.

"...i have Neva heard before dat was the unique part of the book its new info and the info was all true and facts and things i've experienced before but..." Read more

"...This insight can lead to a deeper level of connection and communication in relationships, fostering a more fulfilling and passionate connection...." Read more

"...tricks or strategies to get laid but more of a deep foundation to prosper in your marriage, relationship or relationships...." Read more

"...Deida’s guidance on embracing challenges, understanding your true purpose, and engaging with the world from a place of strength is both inspiring..." Read more

199 customers mention "Masculinity"170 positive29 negative

Customers appreciate the book's exploration of masculine and feminine traits and energy, and how they relate to relationships with women.

"...and put me ona path to my inner core wit the conscious knowledge of feminine and masculine polarity" Read more

"...Deida offers a fresh and nuanced understanding of sexual dynamics, inviting women to explore their own desires and better understand the desires of..." Read more

"...Intended for men, but has many gems for a women’s perspective as well!" Read more

"...The masculine energy is defined by traits, the feminine energy is defined by traits, and the polarity between the two creates a balance in which the..." Read more

26 customers mention "Power"23 positive3 negative

Customers find the book powerful, working well for them, with one customer noting its practical application in real-world situations.

"...This path is a hard one, but it is real and it is powerful...." Read more

"...on how to channel your masculine energy in a way that is both powerful and compassionate are eye-opening...." Read more

"...way, I found this book to be truly wise on the topics of women, and success, among other less controversial topics, as read by a man." Read more

"Was ok. I would only read if you’re a strong critical thinker. Some of the stuff in this book is very strange...." Read more

18 customers mention "Authenticity"18 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the book's authenticity, describing it as honest and resonating with truth, with one customer noting it's not a pick-up book.

"...the unique part of the book its new info and the info was all true and facts and things i've experienced before but Neva tried the outcome this book..." Read more

"...It is not a literal book at least most of it is not...." Read more

"...It's more than a book; it's a companion that resonates with authenticity and truth...." Read more

"...It's a timeless guide for personal growth and authentic living, offering a unique perspective that transcends gender boundaries...." Read more

17 customers mention "Value for money"14 positive3 negative

Customers find the book worth its price.

"...It teaches you how to be a high value man to conquer the world.!!!" Read more

"Product was perfect and price was reasonable" Read more

"...Don’t be skeptical. Buy it, read it, change. It’s worth it. It’s the guide I knew I needed. I didn’t think I’d find it in this book but I did...." Read more

"...It’s one that I plan to reference. It’s worth the buy, even if it is a blind buy." Read more

110 customers mention "Writing quality"67 positive43 negative

Customers have mixed opinions about the writing quality of the book, with some finding it clearly written and easy to understand, while others find it too simplistic and frustrating to read.

"...Because it is a great read and the information presented is always concise with the intro of each chapter...." Read more

"...of applying the concepts described in this book, and the book does not describe in detail exactly how to do that, and rightfully so, because such..." Read more

"...The writing style is straightforward but poetic, making complex ideas accessible...." Read more

"...The book is written in a clear, concise and engaging style that synthesizes complex knowledge in a form accessible to lay readers...." Read more

65 customers mention "Pacing"15 positive50 negative

Customers find the book's pacing negative, describing it as nonsensical and full of weird made-up advice.

"...obvious, egotistical, arrogant, self-aggrandizing, self-important, nonsensical, idiotic, stupid, and a book that is written strictly from an..." Read more

"...is sometimes called "poetic," which is a nice way of saying that he's cheesy, vague, and likes to spout trite New Age cliches as if they were..." Read more

"The contents of this book are not always politically-correct or scientifically validated. It doesn't pretend to be either...." Read more

"...apparent that the woman's role in being absolutely vulnerable, carefree, and not defaulting to their own masculine mind due to a lack of trust in..." Read more

Life changing advice for a few bucks
5 out of 5 stars
Life changing advice for a few bucks
If your trying to change your life whether it be for minor things or a complete 180. This book will teach you many things and make you believe in yourself.
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Top reviews from the United States

  • Reviewed in the United States on April 5, 2025
    the information this book provided i have Neva heard before dat was the unique part of the book its new info and the info was all true and facts and things i've experienced before but Neva tried the outcome this book is suggesting...best book i ever read changed my life and put me ona path to my inner core wit the conscious knowledge of feminine and masculine polarity
    2 people found this helpful
    Report
  • Reviewed in the United States on April 16, 2025
    One of my top three books! Truly invested. Heard about it in a Nipsey Hustle interview, recommended by Lauren London. Intended for men, but has many gems for a women’s perspective as well!
  • Reviewed in the United States on March 27, 2025
    Learned so much about men and women and how we operate in today's society. Must read asap for anyone interested in self growth and understanding the opposite sex. Amazing read done in 3 days.
  • Reviewed in the United States on December 7, 2024
    What did I like or dislike?
    - I liked that it took into account that the difference of man and woman is something to be cherished and that we actually need each other to live a fulfilling life.
    That it is important to understand how you can achieve a state flow of your being when you accept the nature of the sexes.

    Maybe I disliked sometimes the wording that was chosen, but that is personal preference, I am not a big fan of very esoteric things, and for that part it is very raw to real life examples only sometimes lashed into words that can be hard to equate to some meaningful lesson.

    Whom would I recommend this book to?
    - To any Men who feel like they are out of touch with their purpose and have had bad experiences with women, it will teach you why it is your task to have a fulfilling relationship with your opposite.

    Why did I choose this rating?
    - Because it is a great read and the information presented is always concise with the intro of each chapter. There lies some true wisdom here which you only get from a lot of practice in sex, love and relationships that is very condensed here.
    10 people found this helpful
    Report
  • Reviewed in the United States on April 1, 2025
    It’s a worthy read. The theme through the book is what masculine and feminine energies are and how they manifest. It’s a reference point to decide how you want to be experienced by yourself and the world at large. I’ll give it four stars because it should’ve been less pages. I don’t know what I’d remove but in the author’s own words, I was depolarized at some point.
  • Reviewed in the United States on March 20, 2025
    If your trying to change your life whether it be for minor things or a complete 180. This book will teach you many things and make you believe in yourself.
    Customer image
    5.0 out of 5 stars
    Life changing advice for a few bucks

    Reviewed in the United States on March 20, 2025
    If your trying to change your life whether it be for minor things or a complete 180. This book will teach you many things and make you believe in yourself.
    Images in this review
    Customer image
    One person found this helpful
    Report
  • Reviewed in the United States on December 17, 2024
    I have been on a growth journey all my life. I had an absent father whom made fun of my 1st wet dream along with my uncle. No one taught me a bout sex let alone a spiritual journey. I was struggling with my masculinity. I have been on a spiritual path for over a year which gave me the growth, capacity, and maturity leading me to understanding this is leveling up and clearly lays out the ground work for honoring our masculinity. I will use this book as a reference to guide me through my relationship with my spouse to honor her feminine energy while understanding wholly my masculine energy and understand there is nothing in this world that compares to the power of a man’s masculinity and we should own it and use it to give this gift to the world and our mate.
    4 people found this helpful
    Report
  • Reviewed in the United States on March 29, 2025
    Perfect first book for the awaken male
    One person found this helpful
    Report

Top reviews from other countries

  • Callum
    5.0 out of 5 stars Great read
    Reviewed in Australia on September 2, 2024
    I wish I read this book sooner, lots to learn and take on as a male trying to understand everything in a woman (if that’s possible). Will be a book I read again to really imbed it in the brain.
  • Syahmim
    5.0 out of 5 stars A different outlook
    Reviewed in Singapore on May 4, 2024
    It provides a look into different aspects of life. It encourages men to view challenges and resistances as opportunities for personal development and to understand our relationships.
  • Mahmoud
    5.0 out of 5 stars Good
    Reviewed in the United Arab Emirates on February 17, 2025
    Good
  • Lumendeus
    5.0 out of 5 stars One of the greatest books in the world
    Reviewed in Sweden on May 6, 2022
    Just buy it already.
  • Aman Kumar
    5.0 out of 5 stars Must read book
    Reviewed in India on January 9, 2025
    This contains high value knowledge of being man this will teach you how to become man