It seems that I am always in a rush.
I find it very difficult to just do what I am doing without thinking about what is coming next or when I’ll be finished with whatever I am working on.
Even as I am sitting and writing this blog post, I’m not really as immersed in the process as I should be. Instead, I am thinking about the fact that I need to get this post done and ready to be published today.
For some reason, I always feel like the clock is ticking down on me. I always feel rushed and that I need to rush things along.
I don’t think I’ve ever sat down and written something that had more than a single rough draft and a final draft. I can’t imagine having multiple drafts of a thing.
Why am I saying this? Because, lately I’ve been meditating on the phrase “anything worth doing is worth doing right.”
Am I really giving it my all?
I’ve been thinking about that phrase a lot and how much I tend to ignore it. I get a lot done, but what I get done isn’t always as satisfying as it should be, because I often find I’m not applying myself as much as I should be.
This “weakness” seems to permeate every area of my life. As I’m running or lifting weights at the gym, I often realize that I’m not giving it my all. As I am writing a blog post, or writing code, I get the same feeling of not giving 100%. When I’m playing with my daughter, or spending time with my family, I’m often not 100% there—but, it’s not like I’m somewhere else either. I’m often just sort of wandering through life a little bit “checked out.”
The best word I can use to describe this is slothfulness. I’ve been feeling this pressing need to eliminate as much slothfulness from my life as possible.
I’m beginning to realize how much time and effort is wasted on doing things in a half-ass manner. If I sit down to do some work and I don’t know exactly what I am doing, if I’m not focused on a specific task I need to get done, I end up wasting a lot of time.
But, it’s actually more than that. I’ve found ways to make sure I am focused on the task at hand in order to make sure that I don’t waste time by taking too long to accomplish a particular task, but what is more difficult is giving 100% to the task at hand. It’s quite possible to be 100% focused, but not to be giving it all you’ve got.
There is a huge penalty in not giving it all you’ve got. This is the real struggle—at least for me—at least right now.
I know the work I am producing could be better. I know the time I’m spending could be more fulfilling, if, I could just fully subscribe to the belief that anything worth doing is worth doing right.
Fixing the problem
The good news is that I have been thinking about some ways to combat this problem. Here are some of my ideas:
First of all, I am going to try and not do anything unless I know what I am going to do and I am going to devote 100% of my focus to that activity.
That doesn’t mean that I have to plan out every aspect of my day ahead of time, but it means that I have to at least plan out what I am going to do before I do it.
For example, today I decided that I was going to go to a coffee shop and get the intro letter for early readers of my book done, write an email that talked about the revisions to the chapters in my book and write this blog post.
I didn’t plan for reading through my email, checking Facebook or doing anything else during that time. I’m sitting here working on exactly what I had planned to work on and I am putting my full focus into that work.
I’ll also plan out when I’ll do certain things so that they aren’t hanging over my head and distracting me from other things I am doing. I find that I can’t focus on the task at hand when I have some uncertainty about another task that I need to get done. Whenever I feel that uncertainty about something that needs to get done, my plan is to schedule it so that I can take it off my mind.
Next up, I’m going to try to have a bit more rigorous standards for what I am doing before I start doing it. I’ve found that it’s often difficult for me to decide what “doing something right” means. It’s pretty subjective and when I feel like I am done with a task, my judgment tends to be skewed. I’m likely to call something done that is “good enough” rather than “right.”
Sometimes the effort to take something from “good enough” to “right” is very small, so it is worth taking the extra time and putting forth the extra effort to go the last mile. I can spend a large amount of time and effort on a task or project and have this gnawing feeling of discontent if I am willing to accept “good enough.” This acceptance of “good enough” often negates the entire reward of the effort, so I want to strive towards doing things right instead of just “good enough,” even if it takes more time.
That brings me to the next point: stop rushing.
I’m always rushing. Always trying to get things done as fast as possible so that I can be as prolific as possible. While being more prolific might have a higher monetary reward, I’ve found it often comes at the cost of feeling discontent with the work being done.
This one is going to be one of the most difficult ones for me. Even now, thinking about this very subject, my fingers are still frantically striking the keyboard as I glance at the clock, worried about how long it is taking me to write this post.
I think a solution to this problem may be to block out ample blocks of time to work on a thing. To purposely give myself breathing room. For example, I might feel less rushed if I came here to write a blog post, that I figured would take me about an hour, but I gave myself two hours to work on it instead. And, if I forced myself to spend the entire allotted time working on it, I would probably not feel rushed and I’d would produce an overall better product.
The next task I do, I am going to try and block off time and force myself to use the entire allotted time.
Living in the moment
Let’s see what else is left. How about living in the moment—another extremely difficult one for me now. I have a difficult time stopping to smell the roses. I imagine that if I stop rushing, I’ll probably solve this problem as well, but for now, I am going to try to start purposely giving 100% to what I am doing at any given time.
With every activity I am doing, work or otherwise, I am going to try and focus 100% on what I am doing and also give 100% to that activity. This one will be difficult—I am sure of it. But, this might be the most important thing to focus on. Sometimes I feel like my life is passing me by because I’m always looking forward or backward—I’m never taking time to stop and smell the roses.
One aspect of this that I have been thinking about is to actively think about what I am doing at any given moment and to clearly define it. For example, if I am sitting on the couch, I should ask myself what am I doing. Am I having a conversation with someone? Am I relaxing? Am I doing something else? At any given time I should be able to define what it is I am doing. It doesn’t necessarily have to be something productive. It is better to actively decide that I am spending time browsing Facebook than it is to just be sitting at a computer “doing nothing.”
In fact, I just purchased The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment. Not sure if this book is good or not, but several people have recommended it to me and it came to mind today.
Drop more stuff
Finally, I think I need to drop anything that I am not going to do right. This is the full interpretation of “anything worth doing is worth doing right.” I simply need to make a rule that if I am not willing to do something right, if I am not willing to devote my full energy to it, if I am not willing to slow down and not rush through it, then I simply should not do it at all.
I often have thought that if I stopped splitting my focus so much that I’d be able to be much more successful at the things I do choose to do. This is another difficult one for me, because I tend to see one of my greatest assets as my ability to do so many different things. It’s scary and dangerous to either drop things that I am used to doing or to recommit to them, giving 100% effort.
At a surface level, I know that it would be better to focus on a smaller number of things and to dive deeper into those things, but at a deeper level, I’m scared to do it. I’m the kind of person that likes to leave as many doors open as possible. The thought of closing some doors scares me, but I know I need to do it.
Well, that is about it. I’m trying to use this time in Hawaii, away from my normal schedule to be as introspective as possible. Expect some big changes in the next few months as I start to get everything figured out and set the course for the future.
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